Is Bill Cosby a prisoner to his Necrophilia or Sleeping Beauty Syndrome Fetish?

Is Bill Cosby a prisoner to his Necrophilia or Sleeping Beauty Syndrome Fetish?

December 3rd, 2014 // 2:45 am @ Site Admin

I have a theory…

In a recent Salon.com article, writer Charlotte Laws talks about her first hand knowledge of Bill Cosby drugging a woman back in 1981. Unfortunately these kind of revelations seem to be happening on a daily basis recently, but there is something a bit different about this accusation vs. the others.

Bill Cosby was having a consensual sexual relationship at the time with the girl he drugged. Laws says:

…She did come to me one morning a year later to tell me that something bad had happened. Bill had drugged her. She was not angry. She was baffled, stunned, even shaken by the experience. Plus, she felt betrayed.

“Bill drugged me last night, and then had sex with me,” Sandy confided. “I just don’t understand it. It’s not like I would have said no to anything.”

He had given her two pills and said, “These will relax you.” She trusted him and swallowed them. She figured they were vitamins or herbal medicine. They did not relax her; they flat-out knocked her unconscious.

“He didn’t need to do it,” she repeated. “I just don’t understand why.”

So then, why would he have bothered to drug someone he was in a consensual relationship with… unless… he fetishized it.

I think that if Bill Cosby is indeed guilty of these accusations, we’ll find out that his motivations came from a fetish/paraphilia.

Somnophilia is a sexual paraphilia in which sexual arousal is derived from intruding on, caressing, and/or fondling someone  while they are asleep without force or violence. says a 2014 article in Psychology Today. The article goes on to site a 1972 issue of the International Journal of Psychoanalysis, where the psychologists Dr. Victor Calef and Dr. Edward Weinshel described somnophila as ‘Sleeping Beauty Syndrome’ and asserted that somnophilia was the neurotic equivalent of necrophilia.

IF it is true that Bill Cosby has drugged and raped women, for whatever reason, it is a heinous, inexcusable act.

For his apologists who argue that Cosby “could have had any women he wanted, why would he rape someone?”, we remind them that rape is about power, not sex.

However, if my theory is correct this could be yet another sad case where someone was so ashamed of their fetish, that instead of communicating with their partners about it or finding another healthy outlet, they wound up committing crimes because of it. I’m certainly not saying that you should feel bad for Cosby, I’m just pointing out it’s very sad that

our society inflicts terrible feelings of shame on people who’s urges don’t meet with the standard narrative of what “normal sex” is supposed to be.

What’s even sadder is that the majority of those who are most vocal about this kind of thing always seem to have the biggest skeletons in their own closet. Cosby may have been driven by an incredible desire to fulfill his fetish but because of societal pressures to keep his superstar image, he may have felt he could not share this information with anyone and play out his fantasies in a safe, sane and consensual way. 

Fetishes are absolutely normal and completely harmless UNLESS you feel that your fetish compels you to act in a different way than you would otherwise. Case in point… drugging and raping young ladies. If you feel you are out of control or just need someone to talk to, please visit the Kink Aware Professionals database at the National Coalition of Sexual Freedom or seek help from any mental health care professional.

Thankfully most people will not act illegally just to fulfill their fantasy but that doesn’t mean that there aren’t millions of frustrated and unfulfilled people out there. I believe that fulfillment of these desires, whether they are realized through fantasy or acted out consensually with a partner, are important! You deserve pleasure! You deserve to be happy! You are not weird, sick or wrong!

So remember folks, communication, communication, communication!

It’s the cornerstone of EVERY relationship, not just kinky ones. If you have a fetish be brave and talk to your partner about it, let them know it’s important to you and something you need them to take seriously. Also remember, there are certainly other outlets besides a committed partner. You can find a sexworker in person or visit some of the various sex chat boards like Chaturbate or any number of other methods you can find on the interwebs.

Seek Truth and lose your fears.

Bo

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